Embryos, Transfer, and Maccy's French Fries

The day following egg collection, we nervously waited by the phone to await the news of how our little eggs were doing! We got the call at about 08:30am, and they said that only three of the 10 had actually fertilised. We were completely floored. THREE? But we got 10 eggs! Surely the success rate should’ve been higher?! I’d at least hoped for half, but we didn’t even have a third. They said that because it was so low, they might get me in the next day to do the all-important embryo transfer. 

Now, in terms of days, this isn’t ideal. In an ideal world, you want to get to Day 5, and if I went in the next day then we were only on Day 2. This is because by Day 5, the embryo should have split enough times to develop into a blastocyst. Remember biology class? When you start with one cell (the fertilised egg) and then it splits into two. Then it splits again. And again. And again, until it reaches blastocyst, which is the optimum time for it to be transferred back in to you. In a natural cycle, this is like a few days after ovulation, where the fertilised egg is now travelling back down the fallopian tubes to snuggle in to a lovely, thick uterine lining for the next 9 months. 

Okay, so I don’t want to slate a Day 2 transfer. Plenty of women have them and go on to have healthy babies. This is because the embryo doesn’t (well, shouldn’t) stop splitting if it’s transferred too early. In fact, it makes you think surely it’s better back when it belongs, in it’s natural, warm habitat so it can do it’s thing?! The only thing is, we don’t know what happens. We don’t have an internal camera monitoring every stage of implantation. Instead, if it’s still in the petri-dish, it is actually monitored by a time-lapse camera, so the embryologists know exactly what’s going on, in real time! Science. Crazy! 

We didn’t do much that day except mope around the house. I was still in a lot of pain, and would have to crawl up the stairs if I needed to pee. I was under strict instructions to drink between 3-4 protein shakes a DAY to keep up my strength, and my god they were disgusting. And expensive! We easily spent about a tenner a day just on protein shakes, and I had to force them down with a straw to make it bearable! 

The next day they put us first on the call list, in case they needed to schedule my embryo transfer on Day 2. The phone went, and they were pleased to say that all 3 were still going strong and they would push on to a Day 3 transfer. Well, I’ve never been so relieved! Day 3 came and went, and they said things were still looking really good, so we should just go straight for a Day 5 transfer. We were ecstatic! It’s really important to say here that this is a part of IVF that can be extremely traumatic for people. To the outside world, all they hear is “10 eggs” without knowing what happens for the next few days. By Day 5, you might not be left with any. When I told someone that 3 had fertilised, her immediate response was “okay so how many are you going to have transferred? I think you should go for twins.” Hun, it doesn’t work like that. At all. No one knows how the dice is going to roll, and all IVF patients are prepared for their numbers to drop off a cliff each day. And no one – not us, or the fancy doctors, or the embryologists, can do a single thing about it. It’s just nature, at the end of the day.  

We sailed through the weekend on the high that we were going to make it to a Day 5 transfer on the Monday. We were both excited, and thankfully, I was allowed to eat and drink this time! They actually prefer you to have a full bladder when you go in, as it allows the doctor to use the ultrasound machine like a Satnav to your uterus – and a full bladder shows it right up! We were taken for a consultation before we went to the ward first, as they had to explain what had happened to our three precious embryos over the weekend. One didn’t make it, so we were down to two already They said that one was a clear winner, and good quality. Not great, but still good. The remaining embryo was just slightly behind, but they said it wouldn’t be viable for freezing for future use. So we had two options – discard it, or transfer two and potentially end up with twins.  

 

Ready for theatre - we got this!

Of course, we transferred two! I couldn’t bear the thought of literally just throwing away hope, and they needed an answer right there and then. J and I just looked at each other and said to do two right away. It was important to note, they said, that should I get pregnant and it not be twins, that I don’t think that the other one “died” or that I’d miscarried. They said it just simply gets absorbed and that’s that. For this reason, we decided not to tell everyone what we’d done – and if I was pregnant and by sheer luck it was twins, well then happy days! 

 

They asked if we'd like a photo of each of the embryos - uh, yeah!! Who else can say they have these?!

J got to come in to theatre with me this time, and we watched in amazement as they navigated through my uterus and inserted a catheter that had our precious cargo on board. They told us to watch the ultrasound screen, and just like a *pop* we saw two flashes of light ping out of the catheter and head for my lining! It was the most surreal, magical experience, and I burst into tears from the emotion of it all! It’s something that natural pregnancies don’t get to see, and it was such a special thing for us to watch – after all the pain, tears, and appointments... I was officially pregnant until proven otherwise! We got to take home pictures of the embryos, which is amazing! They were like half the size of a poppy seed and this camera just brought up photos of them that made them look like the moon. Cheesy but, it brings new meaning to the phrase "I love you to the moon and back" for us!

 

I was just so excited to eat something that wasn't a protein shake!

In the TTC community, they swear by eating McDonald’s fries immediately after transfer. It’s something to do with the salt, and can help reduce Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome (OHSS). Remember, your ovaries got all huge and filled with fluid a few days ago, and you’re probably still really bloated. Unfortunately, some women get so full that it can cause OHSS, and it’s actually really dangerous and make you really poorly. At this point, doctors may recommend that all of your embryos are frozen, because it’s just too risky to transfer a fresh embryo when you’re so sick. My friend Molly was actually hospitalised from it, and was in so much pain! 

This is now when the fun part of IVF begins... the Two Week Wait! 

KEB x 

Best. Hen. Ever!

Okay, now this a post I cannot wait to talk about! 

I’ve said before, my ‘Maids were an absolute dream to share our wedding with. I know this isn’t the case for every bride, and you have my sympathies if you’re ready to wallop them over the head with their designer bridesmaid shoes at this point in your planning journey. If you’re asked to be part of someone’s wedding, you better be ready to say ‘I DO’ to everything they ask of you, and more! It’s their day after all, why does it matter if you don’t like your hair style, or if the dress isn’t to your taste? Sod off, then.  

I met with A and H for dinner to discuss what I would and wouldn’t like for a Hen Do. This wasn’t to be a Bridezilla, but as I said before, I’m fussy! I knew I wouldn’t be able to let it go if my girls didn’t get it right, if they didn’t prove that they were the best people who knew me the most in all the world. And that’s exactly what a best friend should be! 

Personally, I’m not a willy person. Phallus-shaped straws and whistles are not my thing, nor are L-plated deely-boppers or feather boas. I said I didn’t want the cutesy thing that was the “norm” for a hen do – not a spa or an afternoon tea in sight, please! I’m loud, and I like risk and adrenaline. I like rock concerts and laughing ‘til my belly hurts. So, with this in mind, I said a few things that could be different:  

• A theme park – Alton Towers/Thorpe Park etc. 
• It’s a Knockout-style obstacle course 
• A festival – Glasto or Isle of Wight would have been amazing! 
• Anything adrenalin-filled... zip-wiring, zorbing, bungee jumping, hell – I'd jump out of a plane if I wanted to on my hen do! 
  

I’m a realist though, and knew that not all of these things would appeal to my bevvy of best girls, work colleagues, and select family members. I believe from this point on, I said A and H should take the reigns – they knew what I liked and how much I’d like to spend (not much, you know I love a bargain!). Set these details out first, so you know what criteria you’d like to meet. This came in very handy when it came to planning A’s hen do a couple years later... More on that in a future post! 

I would say I won’t bore you with all the details, but actually it’s the little details that made my hen weekend the Best. Weekend. Ever...

At our engagement party, A handed me a present, which actually turned out to be the invitation for my hen do! It was Taylor Swift’s 1989 album, with a note attached saying that we’d be going to Hyde Park’s British Summer Time (BST) festival to see her live! As a secret Swiftie, I was totally freaking out with excitement!  

She’d booked a nice hotel in Kensington for one night, and when we arrived in London we quickly made our way to Sticky Finger’s for lunch. If you’ve never heard of it before, it’s like a rustic Hard Rock Café (which I love and slowly growing my collection of tees) and is owned by the Rolling Stones’ Bill Wyman! I love me some ribs, so I was like the cat that got the cream at this restaurant! Like the brilliant MoH that she was, A then produced goodie bags for me and my girls. A slowly up-and-coming trend for hen do’s (at the time, this blog is 4 years in the making remember!), this is a nice way to say thank you to the guests that have given up their weekend, annual leave, and of course money to attend any 21st century bride’s hen! She had included various necessities such as sweets, plasters, painkillers for the expected hangovers, plastic champagne flutes, and my favourite – personalised sunglasses for the day ahead! What a babe she is! 

Personalised sunglasses for an afternoon in Hyde Park watching Taylor Swift? Uh - YES PLEASE.

After lunch we headed to Hyde Park via the tube, and since the girls hadn’t let me pay for anything so far I at least bought my hens their tube passes! At £12 each, it was the least I could do for them agreeing to come to the Big Smoke for my hen weekend! The Park had been transformed – food stalls and fairground rides had been set up everywhere, with bars aplenty, too! BST is great in the sense that it’s like a mini day festival, so there was live music playing all day. Ellie Goulding and John Newman were also there, and it was so cool to just spread out on the grass drinking cocktails while best-selling musicians were playing nearby! 

My Hens in all their Rock Chic finery!

And then there was Taylor. Sigh. She played an absolutely incredible performance, well over 2.5 hours long. She played her 1989 album in its entirety, plus her other hit songs such as Love Song, I Knew You Were Trouble and We Are Never Getting Back Together. You may remember this as the tour where she famously brought out celebrities at each performance? Well ours brought down the house. In the middle of ‘Style,’ a whole range of beautiful ladies such as Gigi Hadid, Karlie Kloss, and Serena Williams descended onto the stage for their very own catwalk! Then came one of my idols... Kendall Jenner! One of my best friends L and I are completely obsessed with all things Kardashian-Jenner related, and we promptly screamed like 8-year-old fangirls! Finally, Taylor introduced “one of our own” - Miss Cara Delevigne, waving a giant Union Jack flag as she popped out of the floor as the grand finale! I’ve literally got goosebumps as I write this – I can just feel the atmosphere of that night even now! 

We were far back, but hey you listen with your ears, not your eyes! :P

After a good night’s sleep, we had breakfast at Bill’s in Westfield shopping centre and had a quick Supermarket-Sweep style browse around the shops for a couple of hours. After this, I found my last surprise – A and H had made up a fabulous treasure hunt for me, complete with bespoke clues so that we could go sightseeing! It was brilliant, and albeit a little rushed after we spent too much time shopping but was so lovely to see Buckingham Palace and Westminster with my girls! The final clue led me to our last destination before we headed back home... dinner at Hard Rock Café London! My weekend was made. I genuinely believe that all the girls that made the effort to come to my hen were not let down. A and H had done a fab job of co-ordinating transport, accommodation, ticket sales and an itinerary, and I know this task was not without it’s share of stresses!  For this, I thank you profusely, girls.  

On a slight side note, I’m just going to make a point about your Hen Do guest list. Do not, under any circumstances, feel obliged to invite people, just because. I ended up wanting anyone and everyone I knew to come, and unfortunately because of budget and people’s tastes, the guest list dwindled quite considerably – which I took quite personally. Equally, just take into consideration when inviting the mums, grans and aunties... Some people are obviously extremely close to their family matriarchs, but just consider them if you’re going to do something like go to a concert and spend the rest of the weekend traipsing around one of the busiest cities in the world! Unfortunately for my poor mum, I think it kinda overwhelmed her, and so she sat out of the concert and the treasure hunt and just mooched around London by herself. I was completely gutted, not because I was being a Bridezilla, but because the thought of her not enjoying herself on my hen do just tore me up.  (Also, you can find the ah – more mature ladies – want to take over sometimes, too... which can be infuriating for the very capable ladies that have taken a lot of time and effort to plan a spectacular ‘Do for you!)

KEB x